Sunday, July 4, 2010 – Athlete Profile: Cullen Gallagher

Athlete Profile:  Cullen Gallagher

1.  In general, what is your background?

Hello, ladies.  Look at your man.  Now back to me.  Now back at your man, now back to me.  Luckily he isn’t me.  But if he stopped using Globo gym and switched to CrossFit he could smell like me.  Look down, back up, where was I?  Oh yeah, I grew up in Sandusky, Ohio (I know, I know—go back) somehow slipped through the cracks and made it into the Air Force Academy in Colorado.  Since then I’ve lived in DC, Georgia, Mississippi, Oklahoma, Seattle, and finally here.  Growing up, I played all types of different sports becoming both State Sit-up Champion and the MVP of the Junior National Caber Toss League.  I still have the Golden Kilt from that season framed and hanging in my garage.  Along the way I was also twice voted Tiger Beat’s Hottest Hunk (’87 & ’88) and narrowly missed the first ever Tiger Beat Three-Peat (damn you, Kirk Cameron!).  Nowadays I mostly knit sweaters for my cats.  I’m on a horse.

2.  Age, Occupation?

28, Air Force Pilot.  Keep your pants on, kids.  I’m not a fighter pilot, I’m a lover pilot.  It’s given me the opportunity to travel a ton, and out of everywhere I’ve been I like South America the best.  But mostly because you can be the richest man in Bolivia with, like, twenty bucks.

3.  How did you get to know about CrossFit and why did you start?

I used to work out in some regular gym up in Seattle that happened to have a CrossFit Gym on the top floor.  A gym employee named Chris Rosa kept watching me kill myself and not get much stronger so he began pestering me to come up and try CrossFit.  I figured since this was Seattle he was just hitting on me.  I was right (kidding), but I gave it a shot anyway.  Once I got there I found out that even though my mom told me I was strong enough (and that just because Chad Wicker could grow a mustache and I couldn’t didn’t really mean I was a wuss), I still had a long way to go with this whole fitness thing.  I got the crap kicked out of me by Christine and I was hooked.

4.  How has CrossFit changed your life, lifestyle, level of fitness?

My friends all find me extremely annoying.  Well, more so than they used to.  I talk about CrossFit daily to the uninitiated.  I put alerts in my phone to remind myself to eat an apple or almonds so that I don’t crash at the workout.  I’m totally insane, but I’m enjoying the workouts and getting better at everything.  I feel like I’m overcoming my potential.  That’s one of the best parts of CrossFit: becoming better than you thought you could be.  I mean—my genetics are pathetic… but my rhymes are sublime/my energy’s frenetic/crushin’ your PR time.  Whoah.  I think I passed out there for a second.  Anyway, it’s good to see people use their willpower to overcome physical limitations.  We’re all giving ourselves an extra gear that other people just don’t have.  I may not be stronger than I’ve ever been, but I’m mentally stronger and overall I’m a better athlete.  And yes, I’m using the term ‘athlete’ loosely.

5.  Name one goal and/or personal record you would like to accomplish through CrossFit?

I would like to become invincible.  Barring that, I’m hoping to squeeze into my Spider-Man costume for Halloween.  They only had a child’s small, but it was on sale.  It’s close to fitting, but I’m finding it too roomy in the crotch.  Maybe I can have it taken in.  Also, I would like to be able to dunk.  I’m not close but I figure once I can do that, how hard can it be to play for the Clippers?

6.  Favorite CrossFit moment so far?

First muscle-up and then talking shit to my coaches in Seattle, Jordan and Irvine.

7.  What do you like most about CrossFit Integrity?

Nigel’s Amercian Flag Speedo.  Additionally, we have a lot of athletes at the gym, so it’s nice to have dozens of people see me sweat, cry, and apologize profusely.  Every other time someone has seen me do that she just pointed, laughed, and broke up with me.  I’ve had the privilege of going to a few different gyms and I have to say that Integrity has by far the best facilities.  I’ve worked out in garages, storage units, and the back of that one guy’s van.  We have great equipment, fantastic coaches, and so many awesome people there to cheer you on when you just want to stop.  The lack of air conditioning adds another level of difficulty to our WODs, though I hate the heat because sometimes it leaves me no other option than going shirtless.  I don’t like to take off my shirt because without it I look like a cartoon ghost who swallowed an inner tube and me running out in the sun is like accidentally leaving a metal fork in the microwave.  Call me, ladies!

8.  Favorite WOD?

I like sunsets and long WODs on the beach.  Shoot, sorry.  Wrong online profile.  Doing anything on this computer is tough, though.  What with its beads and rows, it’s more of an abacus than anything.  It’s really slow at downloading por—um, Facebook.  Also the Backspace key is broken so I can’t fix any of that.  So forget all that other stuff and let’s just assume I said Fight Gone Bad.

9.  Least favorite WOD?

I don’t have a least favorite but the Charleston 9 was the toughest, though well worth it.

10. Favorite movement?

People will revolt if I say burpees, so muscle-ups or pull-ups.

11. Least favorite movement?

Waking up on Saturday morning.

12. Favorite place to eat in Charleston?

Like everyone else I really like Basil and it seems I should try Fat Hen.  I’m addicted to sushi, so any suggestions are appreciated.

CrossFit Integrity, Charleston, SC